Saturday, November 17, 2012

No sweat!

Weather forecasts report casualties due to fog

The trees are skeletal and holding onto one or two yellow leaves

I wake up nearly every morning and the sky is light grey

Christmas markets are beginning to decorate with plastic trees...

and for some reason (better than last week)...I'm feeling quite happy

Winter just must be an enjoyable season for me, because I have a hunch it wont be my last.
I'm writing from a very awesome location actually, I would describe it as a cafe on the corner of an intersection. The HEISSE SCHOKOLADE (hot chocolate) I am sipping on tastes more like chalk water, it's in a tall glass (that's a plus) but it was a bit pricey (3 euros 10 cents).

But I've had better here :) their pastries are super delicious, and the wifi is free. Dim lighting and hipster music will also serve to please. Across from this cafe are places to eat (which is more on my mind). I ate a pretty legit tiramisu and pizza.

Somehow, it compensates because the environment is unique. It's large two stories fit loads of people, and provide outlets everywhere for laptops and such. My favorite place is the second story because it allows me to look out of the window and stare down at hipsters and traffic.

Any moment, Sebastian will walk in with his huge tennis bag and probably and gladly finish my

Monday, November 12, 2012

What's Going On?!#@%&*

Although calm...thanks to Vinyasa Yoga, I'm (on the inside) distance from it.
I have this thing about work emails which should be tended to at the working place; don't check them at home; at home. Home where there is so little you can do at times to solve a problem for someone, if they expect a problem to be solved by 11:30pm (which may be unlikely) then don't check your work emails out of curiosity at 11:30pm which may be your bed time for work tomorrow.

I made this personal error tonight, because I'm the type that tends to stir (not worry) about things that my professional email receives. I work at a place in which, there is absolutely nothing I can do at night.

Why did I check my work email? It wasn't pleasant, and for lack of words (because I've been told not to provide words abundance) things at work are rut-like. hahaha rut-like...who am I?

Sebastian booked a flight for us (dutch payment) to Nice, France! We're excited about it. I'm hoping it's nice and sunny and oh yeahhh. I guess it kind of describes how I'm feeling, all sorts of emotions...many changes.

Change is goooooood I've heard that many times! But it's just too damn constant...I wonder if I'd be bored if it weren't.

I'm on facebook hiatus at the moment, the situation (for them) is desperate! Ever tried deactivating fb like a year ago? Now, if you're deactivating your fb account, there's a whole list why you're leaving...whether it be temporary, too much usage, bored, onto the next, etc...anyhow when you click your reason why- they defend themselves with things you can do to your account to reverse the reason why you're leaving!

Bottom line, don't hiatus fb if you don't want to hurt fb's feelings :(

for me, and probably every user on there it equals distraction. I find myself scrolling through pics, and descriptions of people I haven't seen or spoken to in years, let alone wave at if I saw them in public.

It's wasting my time admittedly...

Question, would you drive to your friends house and flip through their mobile phone albums, for 30 minutes? Literally grab their iphones and look at their mobile uploads in all of it's glory with what they ate for dinner, the change of season, their cousin's baby shower? - probably not :)

So what's the difference between doing it from the comfort of your lap top and at home?

I will rejoin the time wasters soon enough, I'm just curious to see what happens when I take this out of the equation of my day.

I'm going to put my intellect to work and create things...for now, perhaps lists.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

November is still Beautiful

I was going to start out writing this blog with apologetic feelings of not updating it since September...with a sort of "shame on you" kind of feeling.

But who am I kidding? It's my blog and shall hold no obligations nor reservations over my head.

About the title, November has opened up new meaning to me, because truly...I don't think it can come close to topping what October represents.

October - fall foliage begins, transition from warm to cold, fresh blast of colors on the leaves and all things nature, and what really stands out in my mind - Our trip to Munich, Prague, and friends.

Have you ever been to Oktoberfest??
I was utterly blown away at the organization, fantastical, colorful display of a festival that I have ever seen in my life. And since Oktoberfest has been around a lot longer than Disneyland, I think much credit is due to festival for so many similarities it holds.

Walt Disney would agree, because there is evidence that he made Cinderella castle based on the one in Munich called, ' Schloss Neuschwanstein'.

Moreover, Michelle, a good friend of mine with her very hospitable boyfriend Vincent; opened up their apartment to Sebastian and I for 5 days. They made us feel so welcome. Preparing dinners, and breakfasts, showing us around the Wien, and my favorite part: introducing me to a good game of poker, sharing their specialty case of Cuban cigars, and sipping wine all night. Cheers! to good people!

Prague was mind blowing. I'll never forget, for as long as I live the kindness of the man, and generosity he gave to show me a good time on our two year anniversary of being bf&gf. We took a train to Prague from his hometwon Dresden in the early morning. We snacked on our lunches packed by his Dad, and gazed lazily outside of our private booth windows and admired the scenery of the Elbe river with it's green luxurious  trees and houses. We knew we were in Prague when the architecture started to change, and the radio we were listening to on his samsung switched into Czech stations.
Since our visit lasted only two days, and one night. We had planned ahead of time places to visit.
We were impressed, inspired, and grateful for the city which we both concluded on as romantic, dreamy, and sad to leave.

It was a nice reminder, why I love much attention to detail, and so much preservation in the history of things. By things I mean, statues, gargoyles, door knobs, doors, windows, pathways, streets, and more.

Being a Leo, I am always flattered at the various displays of lions represented in different ways around the city. One moment it is a huge statue, the next a fountain spilling water, and the next a crafted door handle.

After Prague, Sebastian's very best friend Georgie from La Grande Motte, France came to visit. It was refreshing to see Sebastian with the man that he calls his very best. Friends come and go, but some stick around for awhile. This would be the case for them, something I call bromance, and true friendship regardless of space and time. These two know how to keep in touch and stay updated constantly. We showed him around a bit, and had a wild good time. Since his visit, I've considered sending Sebastian back his way in the South of France to experience more fun. I have a feeling we take things to serious sometimes.

Oh! I also found a part time job to help make payments for rent and tuition, what a blessing...I am truly thankful. will always have my blessings. Moreover, getting this job was a testament that things can happen for me, and I am not some hopeless English speaking American in a German speaking country. For some reason, I reasoned like that - pity. Self loathing is sickening for me. It un-motivates me, hinders me, and drives competitiveness in me against friends and family. Sick stuff low self esteem. But I kept working at it, sending out applications, refining my resume, and gaining experience here and there...sure enough.

The process can be endearing, but as Claude Sawtelle says from the Story of Edgar Sawtelle, "You can do anything if you're willing to go slow enough." Yes Claude, this is true...but in my opinion, perseverance has a lot to do with it.

About November.

I've been in a funk lately about it. Rather depressed at waking up to grey skies, cold skin splitting weather, puddles, and early sunsets.

All on one day when I started to miss Hawaii and let the change in weather affect me, I was struck suddenly after eating out with a nastyyyy stomach virus (details spared).

I spent days in bed starting Thursday evening, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I had a lot of time to lay in bed and look out of the window anxiously. I spent morning after morning opening my eyes hoping to feel better, and each day I didn't - I somehow felt like I was missing out on the outside world.

And then at some point, into my sickness, I didn't care what the weather was, I just wanted to be out! I didn't even care if it was raining. I felt cooped, warm, bored, and lonely.

And then this appreciation for the outside surmounted. I realized, perhaps I was being closed-minded and negative. I spoke with my Dad and he suggested I start running. Not for it's physical purposes, but mainly for it's "you learn to appreciate the environment better when you face it everyday."

I couldn't agree more...say, I love to read! Why shouldn't I do it out there in the nasty weather? So I'll get myself a warmer coat and a water repellent blanket to lay out in wet spots.

I don't want to consider myself hindered anymore. Just because there is no ocean and constant sunset, that shouldn't stop me from going outside, and laughing, and loving, and truly living with my best friend. I hope he hasn't missed me too much. Because, I am back with a readiness, and willingness to work at what we're given....kind of like creative mud.